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"Helping Others Communicate"

UNDERSTANDING THE GROUND RULES!

6/1/2015

 
Well, after their honeymoon, my oldest son and his beautiful new wife are now preparing to start their lives together in earnest.  As one might imagine, several folks have come to him with friendly  advice on what makes for a long and lasting marriage. 

I chose not to do so, biding my time, and trusting that eventually he would come to me as his father for my opinion on the matter.  When he did, I just shared an old story passed along to me by my own father.

To hear my father tell it…

"Well, your mother and I went out west for our honeymoon after marriage.  We stayed at a dude ranch.  Having selected a horse riding excursion, we started the ride- each on our own mount.  My horse was pretty much okay, but the one on which my new bride (your mother) was riding, seemed to be a crazy one.

On the way ahead, that horse got spooked and jumped suddenly, making your mother topple over. Recovering her position from the ground, she patted the horse's back and said "It’s okay. This is your first time!"

She climbed up on the horse and continued with the ride.  After a while, it all happened again.  This second time, she again kept calm, patted the horse, and said "This is your second time", and then again climbed back in the saddle and continued on.

A little while later, almost on schedule, the horse dropped her for the third time.  Getting to her feet, she silently took out a pistol from her purse and shot the horse dead!!!

I could not believe what I was seeing.  I shouted at her:  "What in the world did you do that for?  Are you nuts?!  You just killed that poor beast!  Have you gone crazy?"

She gave me a silent look; and then in a cool and composed posture, she said: "This is your first time!"

And since that very moment, we have lived happily ever after - no arguments, no quarrels, no petty fights.  Just pure marital bliss!"

All jokes aside, what makes for a long and lasting marriage?  I believe the answer is to be found in the fifth chapter of the Apostle Paul’s New Testament letter to the Ephesians, verses 21-33, where he declares:

21Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. 22Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.

25Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless.

28In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— 30for we are members of his body. 31“For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.”

32This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.


This passage is often much maligned in the modern world, as it speaks of a wife’s submission to her husband in verse 22.  But those who do so miss the point of the passage.

To begin with, in this same chapter, only three verses later, Paul challenges husbands to love their wives “just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her”.  Now, at the very least, that is a tall order!  For Christ sacrificed all He had for the church (whom the Bible calls His bride) – even his own life!

More significantly, before Paul ever makes the assertion about wives submitting to their husbands, he first declares in verse 21:  “Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.”  The word translated “submit” is from the Koine Greek term, “hupo-tassó”, meaning “to arrange under”.

Thus, Paul is calling on all married persons, whether husband or wife, to freely submit to their respective spouse.  In other words, to put it in plain language, marriage is a two way street!  There will be times when each partner will have to give way to the other.  Any marriage founded on the assumption that one party is always allowed to lord it over the other will invariably end in bitter disappointment, for all involved.

So, husbands, love your wives.  And be prepared along the way to give a little bit every so often.  And what is true for husbands is also true for wives.  Love and submit.  Give and take.  And before you know it, you will have enjoyed along and lasting relationship together.

HUMOR SOURCE:  This joke is based on a similar version found at: 
http://jayesh.profitfromprices.com/Fun_best_anniversary_jokes.htm.

SCRIPTURE  SOURCE: 
http://biblehub.com/niv/ephesians/5.htm.

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    Cleo E. Jackson, III

    Occasionally I will add
    a few thoughts to my blog. If you find them inspirational, I will be
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