For those of you who think my dislike of my wife’s cat is unjustified, please pay careful attention to the following news article that recently appeared in the Associated Press.
Dateline: July 26, 2011: FREEMANSBURG, Pa.
A bizarre set of circumstances sent an eastern Pennsylvania man to the hospital with a self-inflicted stab wound to the chest.
Freemansburg police say 50-year-old James Forte was opening a bag of coffee with a knife on Thursday night when his wife asked him a question. As he turned to her, Forte said a cat ran under his feet and he fell with the knife in his hand.
The steak knife went about an inch into Forte's chest. He was treated at a hospital and police say he will be fine. Freemansburg police Sgt. Martin Comer said he was skeptical at first but a preliminary investigation supports Forte's story. The man's wife and son corroborated the account. Comer said he will investigate further but the stabbing does not appear suspicious.
Suspicious indeed! Alas! Edgar Allen Poe appears to have been right about these fiendish felines all along. I tell you: it’s a conspiracy! They are all in on it! Every last one of the furry beasts!
Even as I type this, the fiendish thing that has so deceived my wife of its true intentions is crouched on the floor watching me. If I do not survive this Halloween night, take note of this post, and please, please, protect yourselves!
NOTE FROM MRS. VICKIE: There is, of course, another side to this whole issue. I notice that my husband did not point out another cat story recently in the news. So, I will.
WOMAN’S LIFE SAVED BY CAT
Dateline: Feb 8, 2011: WHEELING, WV
A woman is saved from her burning apartment, thanks to her pet cat.
Most people think of heroes as firefighters, police officers, or maybe even your teacher or neighbor. But a woman in West Virginia was saved by her feline companion, Opie. She's usually irritated from her cat's constant meowing but now she's thankful.
Denise Huss woke up to Opie making an unusual noise that sounded like a small child crying. It turns out he was meowing at the top of his lungs because there was a fire brewing in the apartment building she was in! She woke up to black smoke coming into her bedroom window. That gave her just enough time to grab Opie, her pajamas, and purse, then run out.
Within moments, her apartment on top of the two-story building was on fire. The blaze started in the basement, likely because of electrical problems. The entire building is considered a complete loss.
But lucky for Denise and thanks to Opie, they still have each other.
Please pray for my husband. His irrational dislike of my cat, Rudy, is entirely unfounded. Whether he knows it or not, Rudy loves him; and she would never, ever allow any harm whatsoever to come to him!
FURTHER NOTE FROM RUDY THE CAT: “Of course, Pastor Jack can trust me. Hee, hee, hee...”