Due to a serious defect in the primary and central component of their hearts, the Maker of all human beings, GOD, is recalling all units ever manufactured, regardless of make or year. This is due to a malfunction in the original prototype units code named Adam and Eve, resulting in the reproduction of the same defect in all subsequent units.
This defect has been identified as "Subsequently Internal Non-morality," more commonly known as S.I.N., as it is primarily expressed. Some of the symptoms include:
1. Loss of direction.
2. Foul vocal emissions
3. Amnesia of origin
4. Lack of peace and joy
5. Selfish or violent behavior
6. Depression or confusion
7. Fearfulness
8. Idolatry
9. Rebellion
The Manufacturer, who is neither liable nor at fault for this defect, is providing factory-authorized repair and service free of charge to correct this defect. The Repair Technician, JESUS, has most generously offered to bear the entire burden of the staggering cost of these repairs. There is no additional fee required.
The number to call for repair in all areas is P-R-A-Y-E-R. Once connected, please upload your burden of SIN through the REPENTANCE Procedure. Next, download ATONEMENT from the Repair Technician, JESUS, into the heart component. No matter how big or small the SIN defect is, JESUS will replace it with:
1. Love
2. Joy
3. Peace
4. Patience
5. Kindness
6. Goodness
7. Faithfulness
8. Gentleness
9. Self-control
Please see the Operating Manual, the B.I.B.L.E. (Best Instructions Before Leaving Earth) for further details on the use of these fixes.
WARNING: Continuing to operate the human being unit without correction voids any manufacturer warranties, exposing the unit to dangers and problems too numerous to list, and will permanently impair the unit. For free emergency service, call on the Repair Technician, JESUS, immediately.
DANGER: Those human being units not responding to this recall action will have to be scrapped in the furnace. The SIN defect will not be permitted to enter Heaven so as to prevent contamination of that facility. Thank you for your prompt attention!
Also, please assist where possible by notifying other units of this important recall notice. Questions? You may contact The Father at any time by "Knee Nail"!
Source: This piece is available widely in various forms on the internet. This particular version is from a newletter I received, and is credited to Ms. Deborah Maples of Bristol, TN.
This defect has been identified as "Subsequently Internal Non-morality," more commonly known as S.I.N., as it is primarily expressed. Some of the symptoms include:
1. Loss of direction.
2. Foul vocal emissions
3. Amnesia of origin
4. Lack of peace and joy
5. Selfish or violent behavior
6. Depression or confusion
7. Fearfulness
8. Idolatry
9. Rebellion
The Manufacturer, who is neither liable nor at fault for this defect, is providing factory-authorized repair and service free of charge to correct this defect. The Repair Technician, JESUS, has most generously offered to bear the entire burden of the staggering cost of these repairs. There is no additional fee required.
The number to call for repair in all areas is P-R-A-Y-E-R. Once connected, please upload your burden of SIN through the REPENTANCE Procedure. Next, download ATONEMENT from the Repair Technician, JESUS, into the heart component. No matter how big or small the SIN defect is, JESUS will replace it with:
1. Love
2. Joy
3. Peace
4. Patience
5. Kindness
6. Goodness
7. Faithfulness
8. Gentleness
9. Self-control
Please see the Operating Manual, the B.I.B.L.E. (Best Instructions Before Leaving Earth) for further details on the use of these fixes.
WARNING: Continuing to operate the human being unit without correction voids any manufacturer warranties, exposing the unit to dangers and problems too numerous to list, and will permanently impair the unit. For free emergency service, call on the Repair Technician, JESUS, immediately.
DANGER: Those human being units not responding to this recall action will have to be scrapped in the furnace. The SIN defect will not be permitted to enter Heaven so as to prevent contamination of that facility. Thank you for your prompt attention!
Also, please assist where possible by notifying other units of this important recall notice. Questions? You may contact The Father at any time by "Knee Nail"!
Source: This piece is available widely in various forms on the internet. This particular version is from a newletter I received, and is credited to Ms. Deborah Maples of Bristol, TN.