In addition to cute cartoons showing a convict tunneling out from under a jail and headed directly for a septic tank and a 747 jet landing in a car’s rear view mirror, among the numerous things listed are:
A black cat crosses your path and drops dead.
A copy of your birth certificate comes in the mail marked null and void.
Everyone avoids you the morning after the company office party.
Everyone is laughing but you.
It costs more to fill up your car than it did to buy it.
Nothing you own is actually paid for.
People give you the senior citizen discount and you're only 37.
People send your wife sympathy cards on your anniversary.
The bird singing outside your window is a vulture.
The bride's family throws rocks instead of rice.
The city turns your water off just as you need to rinse out the shampoo.
The department of biological warfare asks for your stew recipe.
The house is messy again before you can finish cleaning.
The little league puts you on waivers.
The moths in your money belt starve to death.
The pest exterminator crawls under your house and never comes out.
The plumber floats by on your kitchen table.
The power is out and you go on to work never hearing it was canceled on TV.
The worst player on the golf course wants to play you for money.
Uninvited guests showed up at dinnertime.
You call suicide prevention and they put you on hold.
You can't afford to drive your new car.
You get to work and find a "60 Minutes" news team waiting in your office.
You have an appointment in five minutes, and you just woke up.
You have to borrow from your VISA to pay off your MASTER CARD.
You have to hitch hike to the bank to make your car payment.
You need one bathroom scale for each foot.
You see your stockbroker hitchhiking out of town.
You step on the talking scales and it says, “One at a time please.”
You take ½ day vacation and find out your appointment is tomorrow.
You turn on the news and they are showing emergency routes out of the city.
You wake up to the soothing sound of running water...and remember that you just bought a waterbed.
Your 4-year-old tells you that it's almost impossible to flush a grapefruit.
Your birthday cake collapses from the weight of the candles.
Your boss tells you not to bother to take off your coat.
Your computer quits one day over its warranty.
Your doctor tells you that you are allergic to chocolate chip cookies.
Your get one free coupon ended yesterday.
Your pacemaker has only a thirty day guarantee.
Your plants do better when you don't talk to them.
Your twin sister forgets your birthday.
Your wife is sitting on the stove holding a picket sign.
Your wife takes the dog on vacation and leaves you at the kennels.
Your wife tapes your picture to the dart board.
Your wife wraps your lunch in a road map.
You’re running late and you find out your battery is dead.
You’re the only one who thought the invitation said casual.
And last, but not least...
Your secretary tells you the FBI is on line 1, the DA is on line 2, and CBS is on line 3.
How many of these can you relate to personally? For my own part, I’ll have to admit to more than I prefer! Of course, most of these are said "tongue in cheek". But every so often, truth is indeed stranger than fiction. As was the case recently in New York, where according to a recent headline, a "New York man allegedly impersonating a police officer pulls over van of detectives".
The article, written by Nicole Darrah and published on August 19, 2019 at FoxNews.com, tells about a man who was arrested after he allegedly tried to pull over a van while pretending to be a police officer. It turns out that there was reportedly one really big problem - the van he pulled over was filled with actual police detectives.
Investigators said that the incident occurred in Hicksville, a city on Long Island roughly 30 miles east of New York City. The man in question turned on emergency lights and sounded an air horn as he tried to pull over a van. Unfortunately for him, the van was full of detectives from the Nassau County Police Department's electronics squad.
When the detectives identified themselves, the man allegedly tried to flee the scene, swerving into oncoming traffic and eventually speeding to the Long Island Expressway. There, his flight came to an end, as he was stopped and apprehended without further incident by the highway patrol.
The damage had already been done, however; and he was soon charged with criminal impersonation, reckless endangerment, and fleeing the police.
What do I make of all of this? At the very least, one might add to the previous list and say: "You know you’re having a bad day when you choose to impersonate an officer and inadvertently pull over a van full of real detectives!"
But of course the real lesson we take from this is that crime never pays. Despite appearances to the contrary, we really do eventually reap what we sow! Had the man in question not been impersonating an officer, he would not now be facing all the charges he is facing.
Moses once told the children of Israel to be careful for this very reason. As he put it (in the Old Testament book of Numbers chapter 32, verse 23): "You may be sure that your sin will find you out!"
The Apostle Paul affirmed this principle in the New Testament when he noted in his letter to the Galatians (chapter 6, verse 7): "Do not be deceived: God is not mocked, for whatever one sows, that will he also reap."
Remember these things whenever you are tempted to engage in activity that is less than praiseworthy. The decision to do so may well lead to your getting "busted"!
https://www.foxnews.com/us/new-york-man-impersonating-police-officer-pulls-over-detectives. The Associated Press also contributed to this report.
Nicole Darrah covers breaking and trending news for FoxNews.com; and can be followed on Twitter at @nicoledarrah.